How a Caterpillar Changed My Life

A couple years ago a caterpillar fell into my lap and it turned into one of the most powerful moments of my life.

My daughter and I put it in a tree and it immediately began to cocoon.

I had been going through a hard time personally and financially and I hoped that when that caterpillar emerged transformed, I would too.

I had no idea.

At that time my toddler was with me 24/7 while I was trying to build my music school. I was juggling a lot.

Pachyderm Music Lab was 2 years in. Student count was low and people weren’t showing up to my classes.

Things at home with my spouse were becoming unsalvageable which was making all the business stuff even harder.

Right before the caterpillar fell into my lap, I asked the universe for a sign.

“Please show me what to do because I am trying so very hard. Help me feel worthy of success.”

Caterpillars “overwinter” in their cocoons for 3-4 months.

Those months came and went. The cocoon remained the same but on the inside it was shifting. I pressed on and

  • became a TEDx Speaker

  • wrote a soundtrack to an award winning WFAE/NPR podcast

  • was awarded a scholarship to Marie Forleo’s B-School which educated me on how to build an online business.

NINE MONTHS LATER… a gorgeous polyphemous moth emerged.

And when it did… things got harder.

  • I moved my business to a new location

  • My marriage ended and I publicly came out as queer

  • My family disowned me

  • I went through a tumultuous custody battle

It felt like I was starting all over again.

When I was at my most vulnerable the people I’d been serving in my community showed up, rallied and fiercely supported me.

And all that time doing B-School payed off.

Over the past 3 years I’ve been honing my craft and creating a safe-space music learning community online as well as in person.

I wasn’t expecting to have to put my business 100% online ever but here we are and I’m so grateful all the things were already in place.

Suddenly adults and children are stuck at home and desperately looking for something new to do with their time and now online enrollment is growing!

We launched a group class for women and non-binary folks called Lady Rockstars Plugged In, and it’s been so wonderful to still have the connection to others through music during this time.

The days that I get overwhelmed with the change and uncertainty of our future… I try to remember the moth and how he painstakingly rearranged his entire being to transform into something breathtakingly beautiful.

I hope that this story speaks to you. Sometimes we need to just take a breath, ask for a sign and trust that we will have exactly what we need, how we need it, when we need it.

Are you undergoing a transformation right now? What kind of things does this drastic shift in our lives bring up for you? Comment below or send me a message!


Krystle Baller

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