I'm a fiery person, someone who is super passionate about the things I create and I'm loyal AF. If I believe in something/someone I show up again and again.
This virus has kept me from showing up.
When that barrier was placed I first was actively relieved. My plate was so full, I had no time for myself or the ones I loved. The first few months of quarantine were scary but ok in many ways. It felt like the vacation I had been dreaming of. Being locked away with my partner, spending time in the woods, etc.
That feeling is long gone now, and honestly it's been really hard being passionate about my work of creating confidence through music here. In this flat, 2D space.
The things that fuel my fire are connection and human interaction.
It's hard to instigate that kind of relationship with students in this format because everyone else is just a little depressed like I am.
I've been pushing through the best that I can and I found a way to have fun doing the work again for Lady Rockstars Plugged In, my online solution to my once popular group classes. I pulled my friend, and incredibly talented peer, Marissa Barrett, in on this and she's been shooting and editing these killer videos. The human connection that was missing can be felt with chemistry between the film-maker and I. We are complete goof balls and it has brought me a lot of joy shooting those vids with her. When you watch them, and it's allowing that magic to carry over.
Here's an example of some of the fun we have:
The other thing that's really started to perk me up is getting back to one on one in-person lessons again.
I can tell the kids and adults I teach are all feeling the same way. It's nice to just see another human being outside our household and share some moments together, learning.
The kids are struggling, y'all. Just like us. Could you imagine having to be locked in your home with your parents as a teenager? I was gone as much as I could be as a teen and dreamed of the day I could escape and start my life. There's kids in college that are coming back home because they are so miserable and isolated, they've become too depressed to go to class.
It makes me happy that we can be that connection for them. Give them something to focus on while we are all feeling the creeping in of existential dread. Are we halfway through this thing? A third? I don't know, but I do know it's not going to get any easier and we gotta take the human connection we do get and let those few masked moments relight the fire within us and it to be enough because it's all we can do.
Stay Safe and Stay Sane.
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